Gay for XXX

Author’’s Note.

Thanks to my brutal but brilliant editor Renee. Your efforts and patients are sincerely apprish”ed. Now enjoy! (ALL feedback welcome and encouraged…)

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”What have I gotten myself into?” Andy said out loud to no one in particular. He was standing in front of his new flat. His flat. That sounded so different to him. He had never had a place he could call home except for the last four years spent with Alice, or Mrs. A, as he still liked to think of her. When the social worker had dropped him off on her doorstep for temporary guardianship she had taken one look at that painfully awkward boy trying to act indifferent to everything happening around him, and it was love at first sight.

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Two weeks he was supposed to spend with her while they organized another bed for him at a home nearby, but it ended up being the happiest four years of his life. She had been more to him than just his legal guardian, she had been the mother and best friend he”d never had and he had been to her the son she”d lost all those years previously. Now she was gone and he was once again on his own. But Andy was surprised to find it didn”t feel all that bad being alone again. He had experienced more love and acceptance in those four years than in all his life. And for that he would always love Alice Anderson and honour her memory by living his life to its fullest and finding someone to share it with. To share all the love she”d given him with. But first he had to move into his new flat, his new life.

Unlocking the door he stepped into his new home. ”Damn,” Andy sighed. The girl at the agency had said it was ”efficient” for a bachelor, but this was about an inch bigger than a hole in the wall. Doesn”t matter, he thought. It’’s mine. And it’’s not like I”ll be having a lot of people over anyway. ”A fresh coat of cream coloured paint will make it seem much more spacious than it is now,” he said to himself.

Walking through to the entrance hall and lounge he entered the tiny kitchen. It’’s a good thing I”m such a recluse, Andy thought, as he wouldn”t be able to hold big dinner parties in here. The thought suited him fine, though. Ever since he could remember it had only been him. Never had he had a real friend to his name. He”d been in and out of schools so much the friendships he did build would cease to exist upon his transferring to the next school or the next orphanage, that after a while he just decided to keep himself to himself. But Mrs. A. had changed all that. She”d been everything to him, and he to her. Even though it had taken a long time for him to trust her enough to open up to her and talk to her about the possible disappointment of losing her, she had showed him that his heart was big enough to allow someone in, and that he really was worth being loved by someone in return.

Andy sighed. All these thoughts were starting to depress him, as if the sight of the bathroom wasn”t enough to knock him on his ass. Puke green tiles floored the whole room and tiled the walls, and made you want to run screaming. The tub and toilet were in a reasonable condition, but the sink was on its last legs. Rust crusted around the plughole where a puddle had formed from the constant dripping tap. Even though Andy knew this flat wasn”t going to be his permanent home, only until he found his feet and got settled, he still saw all the TLC that was needed to make it into a space that he would be comfortable living in for any space of time.

First to go would be those pukey tiles and leaking tap then he”d buy some paint and get his living room sorted. After that- ”Oh, no,” Andy grunted. He still needed to see the bedroom. As he walked towards the only other door left in the ”hallway,” he was preparing for the worst, yellow wallpaper and brown carpet probably, when he stopped dead in his tracks. The curtains were open and facing him was the most breathtaking view he”d ever seen. His room looked over the old church he”d passed on his way and barely noticed before. But seeing the complete picture, with the garden surrounding the old building like a fire protecting it brought calm into his grief stricken heart and tears to Andy’’s eyes. That view justified the apartment a hundred times over. As he kept staring out the window Andy suddenly knew that he was going to be really, really happy there, and for the first day since Mrs Anderson had taken her final rest Andy gave a genuine, heartfelt smile.

Later that evening as Andy was flipping through the ”tenant’’s directory”, as it was called, in the lobby for a pizza delivery place, he thought of himself again as the 19-year-old adult he was. It saddened him at times that he”d had to grow up so quickly, as it had Mrs. Anderson too. He laughed at the thought of Mrs. A. insisting for the hundredth time that he call her Alice, and him answering her each time ”Of course, Mrs. Anderson.” Respect for his elders was ingrained in him like washing his pitch-black hair every night was, and it wasn”t ever going away.

He knew his dark brown eyes held the look of a child that had grown up too fast. That, coupled with his natural shyness and introverted personality, made for one cynical, lonely gay boy, he thought. He was just starting to find out for himself what being gay was all about. Mrs. A. was cool, but she was nothing if not old fashioned. She”d told him flat out she didn”t give a duck’’s arse what team he batted for, as long as he didn”t do any of ”those things” the children seemed to be doing ”more and more, and at a younger and younger age these days,” under her roof then they wouldn”t ever have a problem.

Andy had readily agreed. Hell, he”d never even had a boyfriend of any kind. Never kissed anyone like that before. It didn”t bother him much while he was staying with Mrs. Anderson as she was all the company he”d needed. But after she”d gone, Andy had been thinking a lot and having someone to call him his own maybe wouldn”t be such a bad thing.

”You almost done, buddy?” Andy turned on his heels.

”Uh, yeah. Sorry. Got what I came for.” Andy stole a glance at the tanned and handsome stranger before he turned around and ripped the slip of paper with Delish Pizza’’s number on it off the notepad and was already heading toward the lift when the same voice asked:

”You new to the building?”

”Yea, moved in today. Number 182. Which are you?” Andy was babbling, he knew. He always babbled when he was nervous.

”I don”t live here, well not officially, anyway. I”m just hanging with friends. Sometimes it does feel like I live here though, from all the time I spend here. You know how it goes.”

Sure, Andy thought grimly, he knew exactly how it was.

The elevator arrived just then, and the man said, ”Well, don”t let me keep you. And welcome to the building. I”m Alan by the way.” He stared at Andy.

”Andrew. Have a nice night.” Have a nice night? Is that all you could come up with? Andy silently berated himself.

”Same to you, little man.” He heard Alan say with a grin as the doors to the lift were closing. Andy thought Alan’’s stare lingered a second too long, but wasn”t thinking about that now. ”Shit, shit, shit,” he kept repeating to himself. ”The first half decent guy you meet and ”Oh, have a nice night” is all you can come up with? Shit, shit, shit!” He was still beating himself up 30 minutes later when his pizza arrived.

Andy only remembered the look Alan gave him and his words as he was polishing the last piece of his Hawaiian Paradise pizza. ”Little man?” He wanted to laugh at that statement. Was it said good-naturedly, or was it meant another way? That look lingered a second too long for the usual feigning interest of a passer by. He laughed then. ”Andrew, you need to get laid,” he told himself, ”then maybe you”d stop seeing flirting where there was none.” He thought about Alan’’s words then. It’’s true that Andy could be seen as ”little”, he was just under 150 cm and was naturally slim. He had a bit of definition, though, thanks to Alice and his nightly cycling sessions his legs looked well defined, and dragging that stone-aged lawnmower of Alice’’s around a massive front yard and even bigger back yard every Saturday for four years had given him some well-placed muscles in his arms, shoulders and waist. Yet his frame had remained ”compact”, as Alice had once noted. Not too masculine, yet not feminine. Andy had always worked hard to stomp out any form of feminism in himself. Not because he”d have a problem with it, it’’s just the world he had to live in, if you come across as weak in the least bit people would pounce on you and not let go. So coupled with his ”compact” frame Andy had known from an early age that he”d have to put up a front if he wanted a chance in hell to reach his 18^th birthday, and it had become like second nature to him. ”Little man.” Andrew still grinned when he thought back to his meeting in the lobby as he got in to his new bed that evening. As he drifted Andy wondered whether he”d see Alan again. If he only knew.

The next morning Andy had a sleep in. He justified it by arguing that there wouldn”t be much of that happening when he started job hunting and working, so he milked that temporary benefit for all its worth. Half past nine he finally got up and had a relaxing bath and was out the door at ten minutes past ten. Before he left he browsed through the tenant’’s directory for his local GP, Post Office and Library. On his way to the library he found a little Deli selling delicious bagels, and then and there decided he”d become their new best customer. By the time he left the library he”d opened an account and had browsed through their gay and politics section. He was duly impressed.

He realised then that the General Practitioner was next on his list. Andy froze involuntarily. He knew he had to register with his local GP, but he still thought of that old blood-sucking bitch they had at the Home that came in every Saturday and did her rounds of the house. ”Stop it Andy! You know she was the exception and not the rule,” but even as he said it, it didn”t do anything for his nerves as he entered the GP’’s office. As he entered the office Andy seriously considered a career in the medical profession. Wall to wall plush carpets covered the reception, stylish and comfortable chairs were placed craftily around the waiting room and rich cream coloured wallpaper added the finishing touches to give the over all affect of classy, yet approachable. Add to that the very welcome looking receptionist and you had one hell of a first impression. It took Andy a moment to realise he was being spoken to.

”I said, can I help you, love?”

”Oh, uh, sorry. I”d like to register with the GP and make an appointment for a check up as well, any time at the earliest convenience would be fine.”

”Why what a nice lad you are. Have a seat and I”ll fetch the forms, love, and I”ll see where I can fit you in, then.”

”Thank you”

”My pleasure, darling.”

Well she’’s actually as nice as she seems, Andy thought. Andy walked over to the not-just-pleasant-to-look-at-but-very-comfortable chairs and plopped himself down then completed the paperwork. When he handed her back the completed forms she glanced through it then said,

”Well that’’s sorted, then. When did you say you were available for a check up appointment?”

”Anytime, ma”am. My days are pretty open at the moment.”

”Well then that’’s just your luck, lad, ”cause we had a cancellation this morning, didn”t we? If it’’s all right with you, you can see the Doc right now.”

”Uh, okay. Best get it done with, eh?”

”The sooner the better, I say. I”ll let the Doc know you”re waiting. Won”t be a moment.” She was right. Barely ten seconds had passed. ”Come on through, hon. The Doc will see you now. My goodness, just the skin on your bones, you are! Who’’s been feeding you lately? Young lads like yourself need their strength to grow strong and healthy you know. Like me Nan always used to say-”

”There, there, Nora. It won”t do if you scared our new patient away with one of your many stories, now would it?” A humorous voice came from behind her. Nora huffed at the doctor, seemingly unaware of Andy’’s flushed face.

”Doctors, what do they know, eh? Takes more than book smarts to survive in the real world, like my Nan used to say.”

The doctor cleared his throat.

”Thank you, Nora. I think I hear the telephone ringing.”

”Slave driver, he is.” She said mockingly. ”Well I”ll leave you two to it then.” And she was gone. She had such a presence around her that the room actually felt empty without her.

”Never mind old Nora, she’’s been here so long she’’s practically an institution.”

Andy smiled nervously at the devastatingly beautiful man in front of him. ”Please, have a seat. I”m doctor Crowe. This is my practise; I”m the sole physician here. Ah,” he said looking down at the papers, ”I see here you are one Andrew Martin, is that right?” Andy was staring, but he couldn”t help it. The sight of the man before him left him winded. A smooth jaw line combined with high cheekbones defined his face in a masculine, manly way, and his light blue eyes danced with boyish mischief. He shook himself mentally then said,

”Yes, but call me Andy, please.”

”Only if you call me Jake. What made you choose my humble practise for your medical requirements?”

Andy hesitated, ”Honestly?”

Jake nodded.

”It’’s kind of in walking distance of my flat, and since I”m new in town and don”t have a car and haven”t figured out the bus routes yet, I figured I”d just go to the nearest one.” Well, he wanted honesty, Andy thought.

Jake smiled, ”Fair enough. So Andy, when did you have your last check up?”

”About 18 months ago. I know you”re supposed to have one every 12 months or so, but the last few months had been a bit hectic.”

Jake nodded his head. The whitest shade of white hair Andy had ever seen swished lazily through the air with the motion of his head.

When Jake looked up from the paperwork friendly eyes met Andy’’s and crinkled up at the sides with laugh lines as his face broke into a grin.

”If you”d jump yourself on the table there,” he motioned towards an uncomfortable looking examination table, ”we”ll get this over with in no time.”

””Kay,” was all Andy said.

It wasn”t half as bad as Andy had feared. A bit of personal questions and a prod and poke here and there and they were all done in about 15 minutes.

”Well I”m glad to be able to tell you you”re in top form, son. Welcome to the practise.”

Jake stuck out his hand and Andy shook it as Mrs. A. had taught him a man should, hard and with emotion.

”Quite a grip you got there.” Jake must have seen Andy blush because his seemingly permanent grin turned into a belly laugh. After he calmed a bit, Jake said, ”You said you”re new in town, how long have you been here for?”

”Only a couple days. Just moved in yesterday.”

”I see you”re thinking of staying?” It was more a statement than a question.

”I might. It looks all right. I”ll see what the job front brings my way, though.”

Jake raised his brows.

”Job hunting, huh? Well I wish you good luck in your search then. I”m sure the right thing will come your way.”

”Thank you, sir.”

”Jake, you can call me Jake, as I said.”

”Sorry si- I mean Jake.”

”No worries, it was nice meeting you, Andy.”

He stuck out his hand again and Andy noticed the thick golden wedding band across his ring finger. Of course. A catch like Jake HAD to be taken, Andy thought. He sighed internally before saying,

”Same here,” as he shook Jake’’s hand heartily. They”d reached the door when Jake turned and said to Nora,

”Nora, would you give Andy my business card and the information pamphlet of our business hours and emergency contact details?”

”Of course, dear.”

”Thanks,” he said and turned back to Andy. ”See you around, and good luck with the job hunting,” he added as an afterthought.

”Thanks, sir.”

Jake grinned, and shaking his head he turned and went into his office.

”Now take this lollypop and finish it up, you hear? Goodness knows you need all the nourishment you can get…”

”Nora, let the child be,” came Jake’’s mock bored sounding voice from his office. Nora pulled a face as Andy accepted everything from her and thanked her then turned to leave. As he walked out onto the bustling curb, he realised he was grinning.

After lunch Andy went exploring. He fished out the take away places near his flat and checked out all the local attractions. When it started getting dark Andy realised he was famished, but wasn”t in the mood for pizza again so he decided to visit the burger house he”d discovered near his place. As he stepped inside his nostrils were overwhelmed by chip grease and burger relish. Andy inhaled an appreciative sniff as he approached a bored looking high school kid behind the counter.

”What”ll it be, buddy?”

”What’’s good? Andy asked.

”Depends how hungry you are.”

”Roaring.”

”Well in that case you could go for the Big Foot Special; it comes with fries and a soda.” All this was said as if he was reading it of a menu board, in the same boring tone.

”Sounds good.”

”Sweet,” he drawled. ”One big foot!” the kid yelled to the equally bored looking guy in the kitchen.

”Eat here or take away?”

”Eating here.”

”You can take a seat, I”ll bring it over when it’’s done.”

Andy had to wait a few minutes to get a spot, as the place was pretty crowded. By the time he finally found a seat his food was being delivered.

”Thanks,” Andy said as the guy lowered the trey onto the table.

”No sweat,” he said over his shoulder, his back turned already walking away.

”Hey Andrew, you here by yourself?” Andy looked up to see Alan and another tall black guy standing in front of his table.

”Yea, only me. How’’s it going?”

”Same old. This is Brad-Lee.”

Andy nodded and heard Brad-Lee say, ”Whassup?”

”So you flying solo tonight?” asked Alan.

”Uh, yea, sort of.” An awkward silence followed and Andy said to fill the air, ”You guys”re welcome to join me if you”d like?”

”Rain check. We just came in to grab a few burgers for us and some friends. We”ll let you get back to your meal. See you around.”

”Yea, see you,” was all Andy could say.

Brad-Lee gave a cursory nod of his head before they walked off.

God, Andy, why do you have to get so nervous every time somebody speaks to you?! He yelled in his head. Alan’’s a gorgeous guy no doubt, a bit unnerving with his intense stares but gorgeous all the same. And Brad-Lee with his dark coffee coloured skin and deep set black eyes… They probably think you”re some anti-social moron, he thought. He was pulled out of his thoughts when he heard his name.

”Hey Andrew, it was nice seeing you again,” Alan said. Andy could only nod and before he could think of something else to say, they were out the door.

”Moron,” he silently berated himself. He kept thinking about Alan all the way home and decided to put him out of his mind for the rest of the evening, which of course didn”t work. He could still hear the silky smoothness of his voice that brought images of windy fields to his mind when he spoke. And he could still see those broad, muscular shoulders and firm butt as he”d walked away from him. He sighed heavily, knowing it was useless trying to put Alan out of his mind. Not having bought a television yet, Andy went into his room and switched on the radio of his bedside alarm and settled into a chair in front of his window, watching the view and humming along to Elvis Presley’’s voice singing ”Can”t help falling in love.” The irony of the words wasn”t lost on him as he drifted off to sleep.

The next morning Andy sat up straight in the chair, wincing as pain shot through his neck and lower back. Fuck, he”d spent the whole night in the chair. When he got up to go to the bathroom he winced again as he tried to straighten his back. Damn, he thought. Fucking cheap ass chair. He made a mental note to use that chair as firewood as he lowered himself into a scorching tub of hot water. Hopefully soaking in the heat a while would help with the knots in his back. Andy really couldn”t waste another day before he started job hunting, and he didn”t want to dip too deep into the inheritance he”d gotten from Mrs. A. And that’’s exactly what he”d have to do if he didn”t get a job soon. An hour and a half later as Andy was sipping his coffee he still had a kink in his lower back that wouldn”t budge, and it was too bad to carry on as usual. He swore as he thought about the two hours of productive time he”d be losing by having to go and see Jake that morning. But as he grumbled to himself while punching the number of the practise into his cell, the thought of going down to the practise didn”t depress him at all. As he confirmed his appointment for twelve ”o clock, Andy was actually looking forward to seeing the Jake again. And yes, Nora too.